Tuesday, June 14, 2005

So I'm watching the Discovery Health channel...

...to which I used to be addicted. Not long after I had Natha, I had lots of fun watching Discovery Health whenever I had a free minute. I also spent a bunch of time watching Baby Story on TLC - until I got disgusted with the way in which american mothers think they *have* to approach childbirth - from ugly maternity clothes to buying extremely expensive nursery furniture that is *still* hideous then complaining about wanting an epidural in the 8th month. The baby shows are just like the wedding shows, where this ideal, expected, even envied perfect day is commericalized, standardized, and hyped-up even more - to be followed with the letdown they edit out for 'good tv's sake'. You can build up the day, look forward to it, heck - I'm all for doing what you want to on that day - but the more ceremony and pomp you 'require', the more you're going to be disappointed after, and you're most likely forgetting about the important things that happen afterwards that are *really* worthy of attention... like buying your first house or watching your child roll over for the first time. The *important* parts are those after the commencement - not the commencement itself. I almost see the ostentatious display as a coverup for insecurity in other areas - whether it be with your abilities of a wife or mother or with the state of your relationship. Not that I wasn't insecure about having a kid when I was 21 years old - will I do everything right? I hadn't ever HELD a child as young as he until he popped out - no one else in my family has any children, as I have a relatively small family in the last few generations - my grandparents' families are full of siblings, but I've only got two uncles, one on each side. I've got one - count it - one first cousin. No one I knew at the time had any children under the age of about 7. I read everything I could get my hands on, as a good hermione should, to best deal with the arrival of a new child.

Now what I'm about to say may sound ostentatious myself - but I do feel this way - I'm very proud to have had natural childbirth with my son. I would have felt like I had cheated all the other women before me that had children in the ages of Homo sapiens had I taken pain medicine during labor. Yes, I had some Stadol after he was delivered because of a complication - which I wish I hadn't, since it retroactively affected my memory of him being born. Women's bodies are supposed to bear children - and I do not believe that you should be looked down upon if you have a complication of some sort but had wanted to have natural childbirth and it didn't work out that way. Medical advances should not be abandoned if they really are the best thing for all involved, but I'm a minimalist about these sort of things. Like I said before, it's your day and it should go as closely to your plan as it can - I just have certain internal standards that govern what I feel and how I act about most things, especially motherhood and wifely duties. You don't like it, stop reading... :)

I'm about to call Ed and ask him what the deali-yo is - he was supposed to be home in time for dinner, and it's almost 7:30... he didn't answer the phone - so he's probably still working on something, trying to 'fix it'. I hope he does soon...

I'm about tired of typing, so I'm going to watching TV full-time. The above isn't that I'm baby-crazy, I just happened to have this on my mind, sweetie.

Man, that Geico commercial about the reality show 'Tiny House' is hilarious - it makes me laugh every time I see it!


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