Friday, July 29, 2005

So I'm being lazy lazy lazy lazy lazy lazy Jane...

...although I'm not waiting waiting waiting waiting waiting for it to rain. I just don't feel like doing much other than hanging out at home...

Natha's looking at the Oriental Trading catalog and showing me at least 3 things on each page that he wants - just what he needs - more plastic crap. It's cheaper than waiting for the happy meal toys to pile up, though. I told him I've already seen it all, but he gets so excited to show it to me that I feel bad for cutting him off.

Which reminds me of how I've semi-kicked the junk food habit - I certainly don't eat it as much as I used to - and if I do, I don't eat very much of it.

I've started dabbling in Ayurveda theory and balancing doshas - I have a certain predominant dosha, but I can get too much of the other two which makes me feel in an off-kilter or otherwise out-of-sorts mood. Ayurveda prescribes certain foods, herbs, yoga postures, and aromatherapy to re-balance the doshas. So now, when I'm having a 'bad day' I'm going to try and see if the doshas need a-balancin'. Even if it's placebo effect, if it makes me feel better, then it works and doesn't cost anything (or not very much).

I'm ready for Ed to come home, but I know he can't. I've got to get used to him being busier and not at home too (since he wasn't getting much work done here). This always happens when I'm not busy, and it sucks every time. When school starts for me at the end of August I'll be busier and in a better mood about him being gone, even when Natha goes to school on the 15th, I'll have more time to myself and to concentrate on things. I think that the staying home with Natha is starting to get to me - I enjoy it most of the time, but there's sometimes when I want to be by myself or doing something different. I know it's over in a couple weeks, for good or for bad, and that makes me feel better. Not that I'd make a different decision to not stay home with him - I think him being with parents more and watching Between the Lions has made him able to read at least 3 different words and knowing most of the letters. Earlier this summer, he didn't know many letters and couldn't read anything other than some numbers. He's also a bit better behaved than before - unless I'm out-of-sorts, then he's more likely to misbehave. (Like he's doing now - it's been constant chatter for the last hour - loud singing and talking about nonsensical things. Geez!)

Ed's supposed to call here in a minute so I can see if he's going to be home for dinner - then I can plan the rest of the night... and maybe get some quiet relaxing time - I'd been busy wednesday & thursday and didn't completely relax either night. I think that's why I'm fundamentally wound up now... Yoga helped but didn't get rid of all the excess cortisol I've been carrying around...


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